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3.02.2017

If You Give a Blogger Three Hours

If you give a blogger three hours they will probably go to Starbucks.

Once they are at Starbucks they will take out their laptop, plug it in and order some coffee.

When you give them the coffee they'll realize they want a butter croissant to go with it.



Once they've eaten the butter croissant they'll open a window to start a new post. After writing an intro they will realize that they don't remember the deadline.

They will open their email to check the deadline and see other emails. After checking rug prices on a World Market sale, deleting all the junk emails (how did they let it get that bad?), and remembering that they need to invoice for another job (and logging into another tab to send the invoice) they will finally find that deadline.

Two H2 headings later they will realize that they need a specific image for the post. They will go into their picture folder and start searching for it. While searching for the image in question they will realize that there are a lot of extra photos that are blurry and should be deleted. They will start deleting blurry photos and those that are no longer needed.

And if they start deleting photos you better believe that they are going to rename the ones that survive. Once the photos are renamed they will probably create new folders to file them in. With neat file folders of pictures they will realize that they never found the original picture they were looking for.

There goes a good 30 minutes organizing pictures. Photo Credit: Nasreen Stump


Maybe it was posted to Facebook? So off to Facebook the blogger goes. Once on Facebook they are reminded that it is Virtual BFF's birthday so they write a quick post on their page. Of course this post needs a funny meme, after searching Google and not finding one that speaks to them they open up Canva. Once in Canva they create the perfect birthday meme and remember that they needed to post Twitter party questions in a network Facebook group. They quickly create questions and images and post them in the group. Then since there is no time like the present they pop over into MeetEdgar to program those questions. While in MeetEdgar they'll remember that they had a question about functionality and they'll go back to their email to contact Support.

DING! A new opportunity has been matched with them in their email inbox so the blogger pops over into that influencer network's site to apply. Social links are needed so they pop onto Twitter (why is #EpicKittenFail trending? Explore.), check out Instagram (3 other people are at a local CVB meeting today, why didn't they know about it?), and head to their FB page (4 new messages- 2 unsolicited out of country link requests, 1 will you post this for the karma PR rep friend one, and 1 brand message asking to use video they made without additional compensation on their site). The blogger remembers that they were originally looking for the image that they needed for the post they started writing two hours ago.

The blogger finds the photo on Facebook- finally. And if they find the image on Facebook they'll download it and pop into PicMonkey to brighten and crop it. Into the post it goes. This is when they realize that they are missing a link that they need to direct people to another article. After 3 Facebook messages they will realize that it hasn't been published yet. DING! A Facebook message from someone else asking to be added to a campaign Google Doc. After adding them the blogger remembers that they also need to put up a reminder post about this campaign in the network group.

PicMonkey- another great time killer. 


The blogger will spend 10 minutes carefully crafting a "Please Help Out" post that both acknowledges that they appreciate everyone's help but also reminds everyone that they should be helping more. At this point the blogger needs a bathroom break. After finding someone to watch their laptop for a minute the blogger makes it to the bathroom. They check their cell phone and realize that they  only have 7 minutes left before they need to leave.

The blogger frantically rereads their "Please Help Out" post and edits it for passive-aggressive tendencies because they really do love and appreciate everyone. After posting it they respond to people's offers of help with Thank you's, You're Awesome's and Hell Yeah's.

They hit save on the blog post that was never finished and shut down their laptop. Chances are that because they didn't finish they'll ask for another three hours at Starbucks and they'll probably stay for four.